Who The Hell Are These People?! (Nick, Joe, and Alix)

So, this is a new feature on the T2R Blog where we get to know members of the family a little bit better. Each day or two we'll post a couple of these and by the end, you're gonna know everyone so well, you'll never have to think twice about what to get us as a Christmas gift ever again. You'll just know.

NICK BLAEMIRE
Actor

Which Things To Ruin Song is your Favorite?

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii dont wanna decide, but if i have to, "sonofagun" or "never heard nothin" are pretty splendid.

If you were in the band, which instrument would you play (or want to play)?

id want to be as loud and dextrous as brent stranathan. but as solid and stolid as ian kagey. but as classy and dynamic as mike pettry. except as brazen and vivacious as joe. is that good?

If you were an actor in the show, which one would you want to be?

i wanna be badia so i can be the karate kid during "never heard nothin."

Do you have a pre-show ritual? What do you do to prepare?

i do actually, ive been listening to that song "effington" by ben folds before every show and i love it. i also spit a whole lot of phlegm into the trash can right next to katrina. i think she thinks its for her but its really for the trash can.

What is your favorite image on the platform?

the sex.

Is that actually a real whiskey shot you do on stage?

one of them is. im only a half pussy. i feel that if i had too all the jumping around i do would end me directly in the lap of the ugliest audience member in the theatre.

When was the first time you were ever on stage?

i was the narrator of "the homework machine" at bethesda academy for performing arts when i was 3. i was sick.

What's the most embarrassing thing ever to happen to you on stage?

one time i punched myself in the nose during a dance number when i was wearing white. thats like a facial period.

What's your favorite ride at Disneyworld?

the tower of terror allows me to know what my stomach tastes like.

What's your favorite curse?

fuckballshittit.

Favorite fictional character?

matt hinkley's mom.

Ever know somebody who was in porn? Have you ever been in a porn?

matt hinkley's mom. yes. with matt hinkley's mom.

What is one thing that you really want everyone to know right now?!

that i fucked matt hinkley's mom. oh, and that THINGS TO RUIN is unstoppable.

ALIX CLAPS
Stage Manager

Which Things To Ruin Song is your favorite?

Tie: "Mamma, Cut Me Deeper" and "Never Heard Nothin' Like This Shit Here"

If you were in the band, which instrument would you play (or want to play)?

Bass. I don't actually know how to play the bass, but I want to.

If you were an actor in the show, which one would you want to be?

Hard to choose. Jason. His track looks like a lot of fun.

Do you have a pre-show ritual? What do you do to prepare?

I pour all the whiskey shots. I do it in private so I can drink a few myself.

What is your favorite image on the platform?

That purple leotard lady. I'm not sure whether I'm more amused by the leotard or the headband.

Is that actually a real whiskey shot you do on stage?

I gotta start bringing one into the booth with me....

When was the first time you were ever on stage?

In third grade, I was cast in our class play about slavery. I played the mother as part of an escaping slave family. Clearly I went to elementary school in the whitest town ever.

What's the most embarrassing thing ever to happen to you on stage?

I've had some embarrassing headset moments, does that count?

What's your favorite ride at Disneyworld?

I'm a dork. I liked Epcot best.

What's your favorite curse?

Motherfucker!

Favorite fictional character?

Miranda from THE TEMPEST

Ever know somebody who was in porn? Have you ever been in a porn?

Not exactly, but as it turns out, I have a friend whose brother invented a new model of vibrator. If anyone is interested in buying, I can get you the website. (How does one explain that to one's parents, anyway?)

What is one thing that you really want everyone to know right now?!

Fuck yeah, Musical Theatre Enthusiasts! Even if we're performing on subway platforms, we'll be up and running again soon! So stay tuned. Because on Friday nights we've got THINGS TO RUIN!

JOE ICONIS
Writer/Piano Player/Sometimes Performer

Which T2R song is your Favorite?

Well, of all the tunes I wrote for the show, my personal favorite is probably the closer “Never Heard Nothing.” I think its messy and its too long and its one of those songs that was Very hard to write and when I finished I just kind of looked at it and it was like: “Oh. This is EXACTLY what I wanted this song to be.” I also like Mamma Cut. Incidentally, there are two songs of mine in the show that I hate. They are performed really well and directed beautifully and I hate them.

If you were in the cast, which part would you play (or want to play)?

Well, I’m in the cast, but I’m sort of in it in a weird way. I straddle the line between band dude and cast member. If I was just straight up in the cast, I'd wanna be the Jason track cuz of Dodge Ball. If I was a girl I'd wanna be the Badia track cuz of Everybody's At The Bar. I think the track I could do the most successfully would be the Lance track.

Do you have a pre-show ritual? What do you do to prepare?

I have a drink. And then I go stand in a specific spot in the lobby and drink some more. Then I hug as many people as I can and then I go backstage with Nick and Eric and jump up and down and talk about pornography. Katrina listens and is a good sport about the whole thing.

What is your favorite image on the platform?

I have a couple. There's some really nice hardcore lesbian action, an awesome pic of Dolly Parton, and a skull and cross bones Halloween card that my parents sent me.

Is that actually a real whiskey shot you do on stage?

Oh my goodness, yes. I also have a jack and coke that I'm supposed to drink but I never seem to get around to doing it.

When was the first time you were ever on stage?

In a kindergarten play about the alphabet. I was the letter "E."

What's the most embarrassing thing ever to happen to you on stage?

I shat myself. That's a lie.

What's your favorite ride at Disneyworld?

Splash Mountain, ride. Carousel of Progress, show.

What's your favorite curse?

Pigfucker, favorite. Motherfucker, most used.

Favorite fictional character?

Rupert Pupkin.

Ever know somebody who was in porn? Have you ever been in a porn?

None of your business. I've never been in a porn, but porn plays a huge part in my life. If I didn't spend as much time as I do watching porn I'd get alot more done. But, also, I guess if I didn't watch as much, I wouldn't write songs about it. It all evens out.

What is one thing that you really want everyone to know right now?!

When I look at pictures of the cast and creatives of T2R, I can't help but smile huge. Also, there are three different types of pickles in my fridge right now. Also, I can't wait for Things To Ruin to start causing trouble in its brand new home. That was three things. Fuck you, rules.

That's all for now. More soon, guys!

Stay cold.

Blood and Pheromones,
Joe

They can take away our home, but they can't take away our Rock and Roll.

Everything was going so well.

We had our first THINGS TO RUIN. It was packed. We were on fire. Everything felt electric and wonderful and perfect.

And then the Zipper factory unexpectedly closed.

The hell? The hell.

Us at THINGS TO RUIN have gone through quite a lot these past couple of days. Shock. Horror. Depression. Anger. Public Drunkenness.

At any rate, we're through with all of that. We've dusted ourselves off and put on our fighting shoes. Within the next few days we should be ready to give you an official announcement about where THINGS TO RUIN is going to continue its scheduled run, but in the meantime, lets take a gander at some pics from the Pep Rally we had on Friday night!

Jason "SweetTooth" Williams, Joe Iconis, Brent Stranathan
Have you ever seen a trio of nicer All-American young men?


Jeremy Morse
Fuzzy in every way, this dude starred in the National Tour of "The Plant That Ate Dirty Socks."


Eric William Morris, Katrina Dideriksen
So much love in this cast.


Matt Hinkley, Ian Kagey, Joe Iconis
Bass players are always lurking in the damnedest of places.


Theresa Flanagan, Ryann Ferguson
T2R fans and Ladies of the Theater


Jason "SweetTooth" Williams, Benson
Benson is SweetTooth's oldest friend in the whole world!


Bill Coyne, Joe Iconis
Bill also starred in the National Tour of "Plant..." Talented eyebrows.


Stephanie Cowan
A member of the extended family, Stephanie is also a genuine mover and shaker in the theater world. Cool!


Joe Iconis, Katrina Rose Dideriksen
We look like siblings in this picture.


John Simpkins
Our fearless director. Normally, he doesn't look as vaguely simian as he does here.


Jason "SweetTooth" Williams
The eyes say it all: "Don't fuck with T2R... because we'll fuck you right back."

See you soon.

Blood and Pheromones,
Joe

Unzipped.

It's that time, guys-- Things to Ruin is reopening at the zipper factory tonight! We're getting geared up for a long day ahead of us, full of photo shoots, teching and sound checks... in other words, we're gonna need those drinks on stage.. 

It has been a long month without my fellow T2R-ers by my side, but I am so ready to hit that stage. We had a fierce glueing party on Wednesday. Now that we've been reviewed by  the Times, we decided our bitchin' set should be brought up to our high standards. Other than still peeling elmers off of my body, the party went well! I'm so excited about our new platform (that I hope won't collapse under me) and the little changes we've been making to clean up our already rockin' show. 

Although this hasn't been announced, I have decided that if someone makes it to all of our performances (starting tonight and ending Feb. 27th), I will personally either buy you shots or make out with you. Or maybe both. So hopefully, I'll see you tonight at the Zipper!

blood and pheromones, 

Katrina ("pipes") Dideriksen

Roadies To Ruin

Hey interweb! We are Heather and Jillian, official Iconis roadies since Summer of 2008 and Things to Ruin spot-operators. We cannot say enough about all of the Things to Ruin cats who will be performing at the Zipper - so talented and so gosh darn handsome!
Update!!! Tech for this round of shows is tomorrow. We will be re-working some things to make this show bigger and badder than ever before. Yesterday, a portion of the Things to Ruin family finished putting together new scenery - we worked on a new-and-improved, easy-to-store platform, which is covered with the most awesome magazine images currently available. Tomorrow will be a long day, but we are makin' a great show for y'all and you have to come see it! Be there or be square...no if's, and's or but's!

Blood and Pheromones,
Heather and Jillian

I Was Born This Morning, Gonna Blog Tonight

Hey lookie here! Our first ever post on our first ever blog! Look Ma'! We're all grown up!


Well, well, well... We here at Things To Ruin finally got ourselves one of these fancy blog things. And mamma, we couldn't be more excited! We like to think of this as our cozy little T2R home; a place where you can grab a glass of wine and lay down in front of the warm glow of our virtual fireplace. We will spin yarns that'll keep you gripped tighter than a Judy Blume novelette, post pics of the T2R scene that are sure to tickle any fancy, and most importantly, give You, our favorite people in this whole damn world, an inside look into the world of us Ruiners.

Keep checking back and Come See Our Damn Show, Baby! You've got eight shots between now and the end of February.

First one goes down on Friday (January 9th) at 8.

You best be there. Because everybody else will.

Blood and Pheromones,
The T2R Family